Which way round have you got it?

If you watch the people around you, you will notice that most people follow a strategy that has subtly or not so subtly been taught to them by their parents, their schools, their bosses or society in general.

A strategy that says if you work hard you will become successful and once you become successful then you will be happy.

This strategy or belief system explains what motivates us most in life; if I can just get that new car, if I can just buy that Rolex, if I can just get that pay rise, if I can just get the perfect partner, I’ll be happy, if I can just lose that 10 pounds I’ll be happy and so on and so on, success first, happiness second.

The only problem is that this strategy is flawed, it doesn’t work. If success causes happiness then everyone that gets the pay rise, that gets the new Rolex, that gets the new car, or that has ever accomplished a goal of any kind should be happy for ever after.

But with each victory our goal posts keep getting pushed further and further away, so that happiness gets pushed out of sight. Even more important than the strategy being broken, it is back to front.

Research in modern positive psychology and neuro science has proven that the relationship between success and happiness works the other way around. Happiness comes before success, not success before happiness.

If you are positive and happy you are more likely to be successful, and lets face it, the strategy you have used so far has been perfect to get you where you are and give you what you have. So if you’re not happy, maybe you need to ask yourself a question.

If you want something different you have to have a different strategy, you have to change that habitual behaviour, change those subconcious choices.

If you want to turn your life around and change the strategy, you know where I am.

It’s your life, it’s your choice….

Leave a Comment