5 Truths of life!

You know how you can hear something a hundred times in a hundred different ways before it finally gets through to you? The five truths listed below fall firmly into that category – life lessons that many of us likely learned years ago, and have been reminded of ever since, but for whatever reason, haven’t fully grasped.
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What is success?

Very frequently I’m asked to give my definition of success.

Here is one of my responses:

I believe success is getting a reasonable number of the things money will buy and all of the things that money can’t buy. (People who say they’re not interested in money will lie about other things, too!)

I confess that I like the things money will buy. I like to live in a nice house, drive a nice car, wear nice clothes, play on beautiful golf courses, take regular holidays. I like all of those things, but I love the things that money can’t buy.

Money will buy me that house, but not a home. It’ll buy me a companion, but not a friend. It will buy me pleasure, but not happiness. Money will buy me a bed, but not a good night’s sleep. It will buy me a good time, but not peace of mind.

I’m grateful for the fact that I have many of the things that money will buy and all of the things that money can’t buy. I know many other people who can make the same statement. I mention that only to say that these things are available and, by following the right procedures, playing by the rules of the game, and taking responsibility for your life, you can have them all. That’s exciting!

Success – What It Is and Isn’t as I see it!

What is success? It is many things to many people. Here are a few signs of success:

Success is closing the door to your office at the end of the day with a smile of satisfied contentment on your face. It’s knowing that you did a good job and that those who interacted with you had a positive experience.

Success is looking forward to getting home and seeing the people you love. It’s being mentally and emotionally free to share yourself with them and to be interested in them.

Success is being loved by the people you love.

Success is sitting down to pay the bills and knowing that you have enough money to cover them, this month and next month. It’s knowing that you have taken measures to ensure the financial security of your family in the event of your demise.

Success is knowing where to turn when it seems that there’s nowhere to turn. Having a spiritual life is akin to eating food and drinking water. It’s necessary!

Success is having interests or hobbies to call your own. It’s things that you personally anticipate doing again and again. Having interests gives you joy and peace.

Success is waking up in the morning and feeling good. It’s knowing that you eat right and exercise regularly and that you do everything you personally can to ensure continued good health.

Success is turning out the lights, slipping under the covers, and thinking to yourself, “It just doesn’t get much better than this!” It’s having an attitude of gratitude before you fall into a deep, restful sleep.

And here are a few things that success is not:

Success isn’t calling home from work for the fourth time this week, apologising because you’re going to miss dinner with the family again.

Success isn’t hurrying into the house and hiding behind closed doors or the television set because “After the day I’ve had, I need my space!”

Success isn’t having all the riches in the world and still trying to figure out how to have more of all the riches in the world.

Success isn’t all work and no play.

Success isn’t burning the candle at both ends and living on a diet of food that’s delivered through little windows.

Success isn’t spending mental energy figuring out how to explain why your project isn’t going to come in on time, why you have to miss your child’s school play, why you can’t pay the bill in full as you promised, why your eyes are red and your blood pressure is going through the roof, why you’re cancelling your game of golf, and why you just don’t find any joy in living.

Success is directly related to having a balanced life. If any one area is out of sync, all of the areas of your life suffer. Take the time to examine your life and take small steps to gain balance.

Maybe you have seen some indicators here as to how successful your life is at the moment.

If it’s not what you want it to be, the only person going to change it is you. So what are you waiting for?

Do It Now! 

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What’s your mind-set?

As any of my clients will tell you, I am not so much interested in what happens to them on any given day, but I am very interested with how they react to whatever happens. Your mind-set plays the key role in determining your reaction.

I believe that the only difference between stepping stones and stumbling blocks is how you perceive them. I never bet against any of my clients, but I must admit that I do look forward to the occasions where they face adversity, as this is where I usually can help them the most.

It’s easy to have a positive mind-set when everything is going well. It’s those who can turn adversity into an advantage that tend to endure and have the most success in the long run. I help my clients to look at inevitable setbacks, not as disappointments, but rather as challenges that present opportunities for further growth.

William Shakespeare once said “There is nothing either good or bad – but thinking makes it so.” The average person tends to get discouraged by setbacks – as if we are entitled to only good things happening to us in our lives – and often dwell on them. Doing so is a choice, and in my experience it is the wrong one.

I look at difficult challenges as gifts that give us the chance to work on things that need attention now, before they become bigger problems that are more difficult to fix down the road. Many people do not realise that most top performers employ someone like me, who communicates with them at least once a week to keep their mind-set where it needs to be.

We all have blind spots, and it is crucial to have a trusted outsider’s view, as they can offer insights that regularly hit the spot and help keep you moving forward as efficiently as possible.
Though perhaps it is somewhat surprising, the communication is often more important during times when things are going well.

Blind spots are even more common during periods of success, than in times of adversity. It is important not to lose sight of what got you the results you are experiencing, if you want them to continue. The greater the results, the more likely you will be surrounded by people who tell you only what you want to hear (which is very destructive) and never what you need to hear.

I have seen many business owners and sportsmen and women fall victim to their ego. When your ego takes over in any situation, it complicates things and leads to poor choices (often unknown to you); the best choices are made when things are simplified.

Having someone to help you keep your ego in check, plays a large role in maintaining a positive growth mind-set instead of a fixed mind-set. Most people who fall victim to their growing ego do so because it grows so slowly that they are oblivious to the fact it has taken over their psyche.

One of perhaps the greatest minds of all-time, Benjamin Franklin, fell victim to his ego before realising that no one he wanted to be around could stand spending time with him. Unlike most people, he was able to finally see past his ego and make corrections. This is very rare and a good example of a situation where an ounce of prevention is greater than a pound of cure.

Not too long ago I was talking to a very successful business owner who I had noticed was falling victim to his ego, and he told me he had just finished reading the Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin and how much he enjoyed it. All I could think was that it was too bad that his mind-set was fixed, and caused him to miss the message in it that he needed most.

I won’t go as far as saying that not having the proper mind-set will prevent you from succeeding, but I will guarantee that without a proper mind-set you will never be as successful as you could be.

If you fancy changing your mind-set come along to my FREE taster session. Click here for details!

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Do It Now!

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Employee or Entrepreneur?

Take Control of Your Destiny!

Life is too short to spend it slaving away in a job that you hate and trying to scrape by only to find at retirement that you don’t have the savings needed to live the kind of lifestyle you always dreamed would be your reward.

Some people just can’t see the world outside of their job or small business.
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Networking or Not-Working!

Are you business networking to get more leads?

Are you constantly looking for more prospects?

If you’re wearing yourself out attending scores of networking events and still have very little to show for it, it’s time to try something else.

Networking is one marketing idea that is well worth the time and effort. If it’s not working well for you, you could be making one of these five networking mistakes.

A good way to get started is by learning from your mistakes… How many of these five mistakes are YOU committing on your quest for more sales leads?

  • You go to networking events ‘expecting’ to find clients.
  • You try to pass out as many business cards as possible at every opportunity.
  • You don’t like to waste time with ‘small talk’ and instead tell people about what you have to offer as soon as possible.
  • You try to close the sale right then and there — after all, you may not have another opportunity.
  • You follow up with everyone, making them an enticing offer they can’t refuse — and are puzzled that they decline anyway.

So what should you do instead?

Watch this video, then sign up to this blog!

When you DO sign up to the blog you will get a FREE place on my next Psychology of networking seminar!

If you really want your networking to give you a great return on your investment, this is the seminar for you!

Do It Now! DIN!

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Two kinds of people!

  1. Those who play the game of life TO WIN. (Take Action on what they KNOW.)
  2. Those who play the game of life to NOT TO LOSE. (Keep collecting more information and avoid taking Action.)

The reason why most people do not have what they want is because their sub-concious goal is not to get what they want, but to avoid failure and disappointment. (Fear of failure) So they CHOOSE to do nothing. They just read and study and accumulate more information.
winners & losers
You always have a choice. You can CHOOSE to play the game of life to AVOID LOSING and live an unstable, stressful life of limitation in which, no matter how much you read and study stuff, you will never CONSISTENTLY get what you want, or..…

You can CHOOSE to play the game of life to WIN and DO WHAT YOU KNOW. When you do, your life will no longer be about survival, but about experiencing joy and abundance and creating anything you desire regardless of your current circumstances, the economy or any other perceived obstacle.

It’s all about choice…. What are you choosing right now?

Do It Now! DIN!

Ask better questions!

I’ve been talking a lot about questioning skills with my clients lately and thought you might enjoy some assorted thoughts.

1) A good question can draw someone inward and . . . cause them to reflect, consider and even do so subconsciously through the awareness your question has created.

2) Good questioning allows you to take control of a situation . . . without being controlling!

3) Good questions create higher quality communication. Higher quality communication fosters superior relationships. Want superior relationships? Start by asking a better question!

4) Good questions lead the recipient on a path of self discovery. You could tell someone something and perhaps they will consider it. If they discover it . . . They own it!

5) Good questions create high levels of rapport. Perhaps Voltaire was spot on when he said “Judge of a man not by his answers, but by his questions‚Äù What do your questions say about you?

questions
6) A good question changes the lens in which a person sees their world.

7) A good question, asked of the wrong person, is just as ineffective as a poor question asked of the right person. We were taught, early on in sales, to go to the highest level of decision maker. What if we ask a brilliant question of this high level individual, but they are several layers removed from feeling the impact?

8) A good question, at the front end of a response can offer the clarity needed for you to offer a meaningful response. It will also buy you time to craft your response.

9) Good questions focus not only on discovering “the pain‚Äù, they focus on discovering the opportunities your client/prospect desires!

10) A good question can move someone off the fence of indifference by igniting emotional buy in!

So there you have it…… “If you want a better answer, ask a better question.‚Äù

Do It Now! DIN!

Are you really LIVING or just EXISTING?

The wisest and happiest among us are those who are respectful of their time, and who use it productively to grow as they age. Sadly though, far too many of us age much faster than we grow. We spend so much of our lives going through the external motions of what society tells us “maturity‚Äù is – getting married, buying a house, working our way up the corporate ladder, etc. – that we fail to concentrate on our own inner growth and goals. We never allocate enough time just for us.

Part of the problem is that we’re always waiting for some condition to resolve itself at some point in the future. We believe that the right time to take the next step with our own personal development is somehow going to magically happen tomorrow, next week, next month, next year, and so on. But one day we wake up and realise that we’re no closer than we were. We find ourselves asking, “How did it get so late, and why haven’t I moved?‚Äù In other words, we’ve aged, but we haven’t grown to our true potential. We never fulfilled ourselves.

Let this be your wake-up call. LIFE is right now. Indulge in it! Make it count. Because it’s happening… NOW!

1. Invest the present in what matters most to you.

You are the customer of a bank called Time. Every morning it credits you with eighty-six thousand, four hundred seconds. Every night it writes off, as a loss, whatever remainder you have failed to invest to good purpose. It carries over no balance. It allows no overdraft.
present
Each day it opens a new account for you with the same deposit of eighty-six thousand, four hundred seconds. Each night it burns the remains of the day.

If you fail to use the day’s deposits, the loss is yours. There is no going back. There is no drawing against the tomorrow. You must live in the present on today’s deposits only. Invest it so as to get from it the utmost in health, happiness, and success.

You’re making withdrawals right this second. The only question is: Are you making them count?

2. Focus on writing your own life story, your way.

Remember that every moment counts. Every second matters. Honestly, whatever is given is a gift.

So don’t be so satisfied with the success stories of others and how things have gone for them that you forget to write your own. Unfold your own story and bring it to life. You have everything you need to become what you are capable of becoming. Incredible change happens when you decide to take control. This means consuming less and creating more. It means refusing to let others do your thinking, talking, and deciding for you. It means learning to respect and use your own ideas and instincts to write your passage.

If you want your life story to soar to new heights, you’ve got to clear a path, reduce the time-thieves and burdens weighing you down, and pick up the things that give you wings. Keep your best wishes and your biggest goals close to your heart and dedicate time to them every day. If you truly care about what you do and you work diligently at it, there’s almost nothing you can’t accomplish.

3. Say what you do, do what you say!

Remember that thinking and doing are two very different things. Success never comes to look for you while you wait around thinking about it.

You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do. Knowledge is basically useless without action. Good things don’t come to those who wait; they come to those who work on meaningful goals. Ask yourself what’s really important and then have the courage to build your life around your answer.
follow through 2
Identify what’s most important to you. Dump nonessential commitments. Eliminate as much as you possibly can of everything else. No wasted time, no fluff, no regrets.

And remember, if you wait until you feel 100% ready to begin, you’ll likely be waiting the rest of your life.

So challenge yourself to be who you know you are capable of being. Challenge yourself to follow through – to say what you do, and do what you say, to walk your talk. Don’t worry about how slowly you feel you’re heading towards your goals, or how many roadblocks you find, or how many detours you’re forced to take. As long as you keep doing your thing, you’re still cruising far ahead of everyone who’s too scared to even try.

4. Step boldly into the unknown.

And don’t buy into the myth of the perfect moment either. Moments aren’t perfect; they’re what you make them. So many people wait around for the stars to align to do what they’re here to do. The perfect moment, the perfect opportunity, the perfect state of being, etc. Wake up! These states of perfection are myths. They do not exist.

Your ability to grow to your highest potential is directly related to your willingness to act in the face of imperfection. You will come to succeed not by finding a perfect moment, but by learning to see and use life’s imperfections perfectly.

So ask yourself this: “When all is said and done, will I have said more than I’ve done?‚Äù Let your answer be NO!

May your actions speak louder than your words. May your life preach louder than your lips. May your success be your noise in the end.

And if life only teaches you one thing, let it be that taking a passionate leap is always worth it. Even if you have no idea where you’re going to land yet, be brave enough to step up to the edge of the unknown, and listen to your heart every now and then. You’re worth it.

Do It Now! DIN!

5 Things to keep doing!

1 – Keep working through your fears!

Fear kills more dreams than failure ever will. So don’t let fear decide your future. In the end, you can be comfortable or courageous, but not both at once.

2 – Keep being unrealistic!

To be successful, you have to be a little unrealistic. You have to believe that something totally different than what has happened for an eternity CAN happen starting now. Think about it.

Being realistic doesn’t change anything – being unrealistic does.

Doesn’t it seem a bit unrealistic to be able to use a mobile phone to instantly research any topic imaginable, watch movies, get perfect driving directions to anywhere you want to go, and see your friends face-to-face no matter where in the world you are? Fortunately a small group of computer scientists didn’t think so.

3 – Keep being willing to make mistakes!

Making mistakes is far more productive than never moving. You can learn great things from your mistakes when you aren’t busy avoiding or denying them. And no matter how bad of a mistake you make, there comes a time when you have to stop thinking about it and move on.

No regrets in life – just lessons that show you the way forward.

4 – Keep thinking positive!

Thoughts are power. They create and destroy. What is possible is everything. What you do is up to you.

Look around and you will see that almost your entire life has been born out of your thoughts. Know this, and plant your seeds accordingly. You can change your mind at any moment. So go ahead and Change it, Do It Now.

5 – Keep giving what you can!

Exercise your talents to give back.

Do so whenever you can, because you can. And when you get tired, remember all those people who can’t do what you can do.

Think about what they would be willing to give to have the abilities you have right now – a simple gift you take for granted.

Then strive harder just for them. And know that there are others out there with different gifts who are doing the same for you.

Do It Now DIN!